Seen on the internet;

Thou shall not let low-vibin’ sketchy-ass energy penetrate thy aura.

- A prayer.

#Amen

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Feigned intimacy leads to the creation of trauma bonds rooted in control and false pretense as opposed to surrendering and openness. For men using performative vulnerability to mimic safety and cognitive empathy to mimic emotional intelligence, as well as the woman falling for it, @byermeas said the following:

“A men that cannot be ruled and overcome by his emotions is deeply rooted in his masculine core and a man that neglects and rejects feeling his emotions remains afraid of his feminine core but also deprives himself of the healing that comes from feeling the things he once avoided.

 Often times I will hear women talk about how vulnerable a guy was with them, how he shared a story from his past that he “never” shares with anyone else , or how he cried in her arms and because of this she now feels so safe with him. But when that same man cannot provide direction and is incapable of creating a safe container, that false sense of safety goes out the window.

Vulnerability can easily be weaponized to imitate safety, emotional maturity and depth. That’s why it should not be used to measure the safety you feel in the presence of a man. This outward appearance is alike to the wolf using sheep clothing.

Not every man that is emotionally available is actually emotionally intelligent or emotionally stable. At times he could just be emotionally reactive and dysregulated. 

The connection to his emotions is obviously there but the things that make him safe are his ability to problem solve, to balance feeling and intuition with logic and reason, to provide a safe container and direction for his inner feminine to flow and feel safe in.

The conversation around men’s work needs to shift from men ‘s need to embrace their inner feminine to men’s need to discover and embrace what their inner masculine truly is.

Because the miseducation of masculinity is paralleled with the miseducation of femininity; you cannot miseducate men on masculinity without first miseducating them on what femininity is.

When men learn what it means to truly connect to their masculine core, the reverence, service and connection to the feminine is simply a natural response from returning home to themselves.”

In other words, emotional availability isn’t the hallmark of an awakened man but rather his ability to confront his shadows and feel difficult emotions without being overcome by them. A man can have the capacity for vulnerability yet still exhibit indecisiveness. emotional chaos, poor nervous system regulation and unclarity of direction, which is evidence of his wounded feminine energy, not an embodied masculine energy. Vulnerability in a man us not always a sign of safety. The safety that a man emits is formed not just from his connection to his emotions but the integrity he embodies and his willingness to protect his partner from his own shadows. A man’s connection to his inner feminine is not what makes him safe to the women around him but it’s his connection to his inner masculine that does. 

No man’s attention or company is worth having if said man is not contributing to a woman’s peace by honoring her femininity and respecting her boundaries. The same is true for a woman as it relates to the masculine.

#LoveIsKind

#LoveIsPatient

#LoveIsSupportive

#LoveIsIntrospective

#SelfHateCausesViolence

#LustIsntLove

#SexIsNotIntimacy

#KnowTheDifference

#CleverIsNotIntelligent

#BruteForceIsNotPower

#CantReformNarcs

#NPDAwareness

#NPDSurvivor

#NPDAbuse

#ClusterB

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The narcissist hates you for making him / her feel comfortable to show his / her insecurities, as well as his / her darkest and truest self.

The narcissist hates you for seeing him / her as they really are.

The narcissist hates you for questioning his / her fallacies or blatant lies / misrepresentation of facts.

The narcissists hates you for having an opinion of your own.

The narcissist hates your accomplishments or the idea that you have accomplish anything of your own incentive, using your own natural talents, physical and or intellectual capabilities.

The narcissist hates you for striving to become a better person.

The narcissist hates you for nurturing your gifts.

The narcissist hates you for having standards higher than his / hers.

The narcissist hates you for pressing for change.

The narcissist hates for reacting to the abuse.

The narcissist hates you for standing your ground.

The narcissist hates for apologizing for things he / she has done to you.

The narcissist hates for defending yourself.

Most of all, the narcissist hates you for hopelessly loving him / her through and despite the relentless mental ( and otherwise) torture that he / she has been inflicting on you.

You can not and will NEVER win in the sense of achieving balance and equity, resolving conflicts with integrity, pursuing a common goal or motivating one another to realize one’s potential. No matter which posture you adopt, you will be made to doubt or mute yourself.

The narcissist will accuse you of wanting to start an argument every time you try to have an open and honest discussion as it’s the narcissist’s way of avoiding accountability and destabilizing you. Besides, people who are ill equipped for mature conversations do not know how to engage in effective communication with their mate. 

The narcissist sets you up for failure the moment you enter into a commitment with them in quality of narcissistic supply. You are recruited to play the role of scapegoat. Nothing you do will ever be satisfactory enough. Nothing about you will be adequate for very long. That is all.

#EmotionalAbuse #PhysicalAbuse #FinancialAbuse #ChooseYourself #HealYourself #ProtectYourEnergy #BewareOfNarcs